Forest Service Complaints

These sound like possibly true complaints, but no way to know for sure. Found on the Internet.

Forest Service Complaints
• A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call."

• "Escalators would help on steep uphill sections."

• "Instead of a permit system or regulations, the Forest Service needs to reduce worldwide population growth to limit the number of visitors to wilderness."

• "Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands."

• "Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals."

• "All the mile markers are missing this year."

• "Found a smoldering cigarette left by a horse."

• "Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill."

• "Too many bugs and leeches and spiders and spider webs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests."

• "Please pave the trails so they can be plowed of snow in the winter."

• "Chairlifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them."

• "The coyotes made too much noise last night and kept me awake. Please eradicate these annoying animals."

• "Reflectors need to be placed on trees every 50 feet so people can hike at night with flashlights."

• "Need more signs to keep area pristine."

• "A McDonald's would be nice at the trailhead."

• "Too many rocks in the mountains."

• "The places where trails do not exist are not well marked."

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The cure for a fallacious argument is a better argument, not the suppression of ideas.
-- Carl Sagan

Having worked with the public for 40 years I have no doubt that these complaints are very possibly true.