The last post reminds me of classic list of excuses for auto accidents reported to insurance companies. Originally published in the Toronto Sun, July 26, 1977
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
The guy was all over the road; I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up obscurring my vision. I
did not see the other car.
I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
I was on my way to the doctors with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished.
I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him.
The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him.
I saw the slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.
The indirect cause of this accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cat.
The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front.
I was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other vehicle. The driver and passengers then left immediately for a vacation with injuries.
The cure for a fallacious argument is a better argument, not the suppression of ideas.
-- Carl Sagan